Monday, February 13, 2012

Countdown to Valentine's day #5 - The "nice guy" problem.

Let's talk about the "nice guy" problem.

You might want to pay attention to this article if you are one of the following:

a) You nurse a girl after a break-up only to see her date someone else after recovery.
b) You are always big brother or gor-gor to girls, close enough to share personal problems but not close enough to exchange bodily fluids.
c) You give her up for the greater good because another guy needs her more. ( How noble !)
d) You are an engineer stuck in a dating event full of female accountants.

First of all, don't malign nice guys. Nice guys make great spouses !

The problem is not because you are nice. As explained before, you have the combined traits which makes you a loser in the genetic race. You are probably introverted and lack openness to new experiences.

While either trait is not a problem, a combination of the two can result in a disaster. Your dating life and problem is easily summed up to a problem :

If she dates you, will you be able to provide a life of variety and surprise. Can you keep her engaged an interested in a relationship ?

While you probably make a better husband than the disagreeble extrovert otherwise known as a jerk. He is spreading his wild oats by using negative statements to attack women's self esteem, once that self-esteem hits rock bottom, he proceeds to sleep with her. Next week, the bloody bastard will be at it again in another watering hole.

Is there no justice in this world ?

Some tips for all the nice guys out there :

a) Expand your musical interests. It's not always country music or stupid love ballads.
b) Go to the museum. Just go and force yourself to like something, if you're an engineer, still... fucking go to the museum.
c) Expand your meal palate. Steak tartar anyone ? What about French ?
c) Learn the art of conversation. What do you do ? What made you decide to do what you do ? What is your philosophy in life ? Are men too macho or too sensitive these days ? Go memorize a fricking list of questions if you lack creativity.
d) Pick up something distracting like Magic for example. ( But not Magic the Gathering, I know many are into Serra Angels ! )

Anyway, here's my two cents worth of advice.

Tomorrow is your big day.

Happy Valentine's Day !

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